Life has been a bit rough over the past couple of years, particularly so in recent months… Just when I'd begun to think it couldn't get any tougher, and that I 'deserved' a break, things got worse! I've been really struggling. My good friend Ruth has said, a few times, 'Be kind to yourself.' I couldn't, really, because I hadn't the foggiest what she was on about! So, a couple of days ago, a conversation, via SMS, ensued.
Ruth: Just be kind to yourself and don't overdo it.
Phil: Thank you. I'm never sure what being kind to myself means, but I'll try.
Ruth: I think being kind to yourself is allowing yourself to rest and not having to do everything.
This morning, after my swim, I ought to have been cleaning bathrooms, sorting washing, etc. But instead, because it was a nice, sunny, morning (the second in two days), I decided to 'be kind to myself' and not do chores, but instead to take myself out and relax in the sun. We're very fortunate, living here, because it's almost no distance to open fields and lovely scenery. So I grabbed my camera bag, my keys, my phone and set off.
I found myself sat on a bench by a pool. The words 'He leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.' came to mind, so out came my phone and I looked up Psalm 23. One of the brilliant things about smartphones is that you can take a bible (or even several different bibles) with you wherever you go, without having to lug big heavy books.
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.
So, I seem to be learning to be kind to myself. I haven't cleaned the bathrooms. But it'll rain one day soon, and I'll clean them then - they're not desperately dirty. And in the meantime, I've had time out in the loveliness of the world, with God and His word for company.
